the Hyperion Chronicles
“If Death had hotels would they be Holiday Inns?”
Author’s Note: This originally was a Hyperion X column, which is more raw and uncensored than here, but I felt compelled to share this with the wider audience. If you’re easily offended, I advise you skip it. Also, this column if not meant to attack anyone individually, and if you recently lost someone you have my deepest sympathies.
#146 The Business of Death
I hate the business of death. I hate that it costs money to die. I hate that money you’ve earned over your lifetime—and paid taxes on; I might add—is taxed again the moment you go. I hate the death tax, the fees for the death certificate, the tiny little assaults on your pocketbook at your worst hour because they know there is no way to fight it. What are you going to do: bring him back?
I hate how important dead bodies are to us. I hate that the very people who prattle on about a soul and “Once the body dies the soul moves on” are the same ones who push for funerals for people to say goodbye. If there is a soul, why do we need to say goodbye to the husk left behind?
I hate that this quest for bodies leads our military to go back into enemy territory to retrieve the dead, often costing more lives. I hate that the dead get more consideration than the living.
I hate the push in our society to extend the “grieving process,” as if it wasn’t another way just to bleed people dry. I hate the somber services where everyone is dressed in black and expected to be quiet and reflective and only say nice things about the Dearly Departed, no matter how much of a son-of-a-bitch he might have been.
I hate how much funerals cost. I hate that they want you to spend thousands of dollars on a piece of wood that’s going to be buried in the ground. I hate that even if you opt for cremation, they still try to get you to buy a casket—to be cremated!—or at least rent one for a proper funeral. I hate that if God forbid you buy a cheap casket everyone is going to think you’re a cheap person, and didn’t respect the Dearly Departed.
I hate that cars will let the entire funeral procession through; “out of respect.” I hate that for most people, they have to wait until the guy is dead to show any respect at all. They likely cut the guy off in traffic when he was still alive, but instead of showing some respect then, they wait until it no longer matters.
I hate the exorbitant rates of the death care industry. I hate that they want you to pay thousands of dollars to keep up a gravesite or mausoleum.
I hate the pressure put on the family after someone dies. I hate the push to go through the “grieving process” as if that’s the magic answer. I hate the cookie-cutter approach to how people are supposed to grieve. I hate being labeled different or out-of-step or selfish if I don’t want to participate in the fraud of the business of death.
I hate that most people aren’t honest about the whole dog-and-pony show surrounding death. It’s saying goodbye and tradition—and I have no problem with that—but this is no intrinsic reason for the spectacle, no natural order handed down by God that says, “This is how you must say goodbye.” Other cultures manage to do so much more quickly and smoothly. Of course, they are much more used to death, and when you’re relatively rich, I guess you can make a bigger deal about it.
No, the real reason for the costumes, the masks, the acting, and the pomp and circumstance is that people are so damn grateful it’s not them lying there, and petrified it will be if they don’t follow every prescribed motion and behave just as expected. This is why people will so rarely be honest if they didn’t like the person who died, afraid to break decorum and tempt the Fates. I hate the business of death. I hate being on the fringe for seeing the ritual and pageantry for it is; pandering to whatever God you believe in that He doesn’t take you next.
Hyperion
August 26, 2003
Credits
Editing and moral support from Bear
@2003 the Hyperion Chronicles
“If Death had hotels would they be Holiday Inns?”
Author’s Note: This originally was a Hyperion X column, which is more raw and uncensored than here, but I felt compelled to share this with the wider audience. If you’re easily offended, I advise you skip it. Also, this column if not meant to attack anyone individually, and if you recently lost someone you have my deepest sympathies.
Listen as you read:
#146 The Business of Death
I hate the business of death. I hate that it costs money to die. I hate that money you’ve earned over your lifetime—and paid taxes on; I might add—is taxed again the moment you go. I hate the death tax, the fees for the death certificate, the tiny little assaults on your pocketbook at your worst hour because they know there is no way to fight it. What are you going to do: bring him back?
I hate how important dead bodies are to us. I hate that the very people who prattle on about a soul and “Once the body dies the soul moves on” are the same ones who push for funerals for people to say goodbye. If there is a soul, why do we need to say goodbye to the husk left behind?
I hate that this quest for bodies leads our military to go back into enemy territory to retrieve the dead, often costing more lives. I hate that the dead get more consideration than the living.
I hate the push in our society to extend the “grieving process,” as if it wasn’t another way just to bleed people dry. I hate the somber services where everyone is dressed in black and expected to be quiet and reflective and only say nice things about the Dearly Departed, no matter how much of a son-of-a-bitch he might have been.
I hate how much funerals cost. I hate that they want you to spend thousands of dollars on a piece of wood that’s going to be buried in the ground. I hate that even if you opt for cremation, they still try to get you to buy a casket—to be cremated!—or at least rent one for a proper funeral. I hate that if God forbid you buy a cheap casket everyone is going to think you’re a cheap person, and didn’t respect the Dearly Departed.
I hate that cars will let the entire funeral procession through; “out of respect.” I hate that for most people, they have to wait until the guy is dead to show any respect at all. They likely cut the guy off in traffic when he was still alive, but instead of showing some respect then, they wait until it no longer matters.
I hate the exorbitant rates of the death care industry. I hate that they want you to pay thousands of dollars to keep up a gravesite or mausoleum.
I hate the pressure put on the family after someone dies. I hate the push to go through the “grieving process” as if that’s the magic answer. I hate the cookie-cutter approach to how people are supposed to grieve. I hate being labeled different or out-of-step or selfish if I don’t want to participate in the fraud of the business of death.
I hate that most people aren’t honest about the whole dog-and-pony show surrounding death. It’s saying goodbye and tradition—and I have no problem with that—but this is no intrinsic reason for the spectacle, no natural order handed down by God that says, “This is how you must say goodbye.” Other cultures manage to do so much more quickly and smoothly. Of course, they are much more used to death, and when you’re relatively rich, I guess you can make a bigger deal about it.
No, the real reason for the costumes, the masks, the acting, and the pomp and circumstance is that people are so damn grateful it’s not them lying there, and petrified it will be if they don’t follow every prescribed motion and behave just as expected. This is why people will so rarely be honest if they didn’t like the person who died, afraid to break decorum and tempt the Fates. I hate the business of death. I hate being on the fringe for seeing the ritual and pageantry for it is; pandering to whatever God you believe in that He doesn’t take you next.
Hyperion
August 26, 2003
Credits
Editing and moral support from Bear
@2003 the Hyperion Chronicles
2 comments:
I can only say AMEN!
Astute observation, as always.
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