I've been thinking a lot about names lately, especially things that are mis-named. What's up with that? We want people new to America to learn English, the least we can do is call things what they are! Below I have listed some of the worst examples.
THE MOST MISNAMED THINGS IN THE WORLD (AND POSSIBLY THE SOLAR SYSTEM) TODAY
#17 Turtles - I guess I shouldn't complain, since real turtles don't taste this good, but the principle....
#16 Urinal Cake - Come to think of it, why would you eat a real cake in a urinal? Again, though, the principle!
#15 Sweetbread - There are Bad Carbs, and then there's just friggin' ridiculous.
#14 Paradise, Michigan - I don't know where Paradise is, but I know sure as shootin' it ain't in Michigan.
#13 Headcheese - I'm not quite sure what I expected headcheese to look like, but that ain't it.
#12 Grape Nuts - I've yet to figure out what Grape Nuts are, but I know two things it is not: grapes and nuts.
#11 Rocky Mountain Oysters - If you're ordering Oysters all the way in the Rocky Mountains, you really have no one to blame.
#10 Cheesecake - It doesn't taste like cheese or cake - it just tastes awful, and anyone who disagrees with me is clearly with the terrorists.
#09 Poker Chips - As Homer would say, "Don't try to eat these so-called chips."
#08 Tossed Salad - Umm....I must have made a mistake on this one. Just ignore it...coughcough
#07 Elephant Ears - My biggest complaint - no way those are the right size! Make 'em Elephant-size and I'm flexible on the pastry.
#06 Naked Lunch - To quote Nelson Muntz, "I can think of at least two things wrong with that title."
#05 Spotted Dick - I would have bet money this was a Venereal Disease. Looking at the picture, don't rule that out.
#04 Bearclaws - I thought eating a bear would give me the strength of a bear, but all I got was a sugar-coma.
#03 Hot Dog - If we do end up going the literal way, I vote for poodles first. As much as those dogs are pampered, they have to be the Kobe Beef of dogs.
#02 Black Light - For the last time - IT'S PURPLE. CALL IT A PURPLE LIGHT!
and the number one _______ is......
#01 NeverEnding Story - 'Nuff said.
The first picture is Greenland, but it's all ice.
You got that, right?
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